TOP 10
10. Read books – Attempt to appear smart by reading while you simultaneously piss your degree away
9. Train your dog – Having a mutt is good. Having a mutt that can sit is better
8. Put off your uni work – Just treat it like a holiday and live with the consequences later, you can always claim a derived grade for world pandemic related stress later 😉
7. Start exercising – Lying to yourself about how healthy you’ll be will take your mind off your constant failures
6. Piss off fake health experts – Argue with tools on Facebook. Nothing passes the time like rarking someone up
5. Update your Spotify playlists – Go out there and break away from the same albums you’ve been listening to for 4 years
4. Fight with your family – One outs dad, winner gets the hand sanitiser
3. Keep writing for Nexus – An essential job, keeping me afloat while I leech off my parents for the entire time
2. Masturbate excessively – Self explanatory
1. Stay inside – Follow the rules so you don’t kill someone’s grandparents you prat
