Disclaimer: I definitely do have access to all the uni blocks and I wasn’t just hiding out after hours. 

 

The University of Waikato can be an endless fortress of walls upon walls. You know that movie Labrynth? It was written about Waikato, trust me, I’m a journalist. Just know that I can relate when you say that you hear knocks in the wall or some scampering in the halls every now and then. How can something so old and so vast not contain hidden corridors and secrets that would rival even the almighty Illuminati. You’re probably wondering where I’m going with all this–so am I. But the idea was pitched to me, and I’ll make it into a series of doing different shit on campus so you don’t have to. So I present to you, staying overnight in all the uni blocks that I can. 

 

K Basement

 

8:00 pm — Had high hopes for the old mate. But I was sorely disappointed when I was found at the beginning of the night. Probably leaving doors open and jammed wasn’t a good idea and a sure way of getting caught. There’s a major part of me that feels that it wouldn’t have provided major thrills of epic proportions. 

 

The Basement (WSU)

 

One of the less haunted ones. Though if you’ve not been there in the dark, it’s not comfy nor is it the most inviting place. But here’s what I saw:

 

11:00 pm — there were flashes for a moment, and I thought that it was finally my time to leave this plane of existence. The worst part though? I was ready and accepting of my new life no longer breathing.

 

12:00 am — There was a voice. Now what that voice said? I don’t know, but there was a voice. It was high-pitched and was just like screeching through the building. 

 

4:00 am — One other voice could be heard. But the jury is out on whether it was just me hearing shit this time. Maybe I wanted it to be another voice in the hopes that this wasn’t going to become a few more hours of silence that were interrupted by my staggered breath and popcorn lung.

 

7:00 am — Finally made my exit and it wasn’t the most interesting night. I enjoyed my stay but I probably wouldn’t stay again. Those padded seats don’t provide much comfort nor is the material that nice on the skin. Note to those planning on staying, bring a pillow and a blanket. It’s cold and you need to be better prepared than I ever was. Caution to the win.

 

L Block

 

9:00 pm — Had to dim my laptop brightness because I’m fairly certain that someone came in to check that the theatre was empty. Surprise shawty, I’m watching minecraft videos with my headphones on. Lucky I’m too poor for the noise-cancelling kind, hey. 

 

2:00 am — Okay, you’re for sure never going to believe me but I almost got a photo of the ghost. Ghost is probably a stretch but please find attached a blurry pic of what I believed to be an apparition that showed themselves to me. Although on second thought, it could be just the light from my phone reflecting. Fuck.

 

7:00 am — Nothing to be found here. Packed up my shit and hit the road. No ghouls, only my brain failing me in all scenarios. Sorry team.

 

Not the worst choice, but it was sort of uncomfortable as I couldn’t really get anywhere soft enough to relax. I tried behind the whiteboard but got freaked. Scary but not like The Conjuring, DNF.

 

The Library

 

10:00 pm — It’s quiet here. Ha ha, I get the irony okay, though it’s exceptionally silent, even my breath is nervous that it’s going to get told off for making sounds. There was a low hum downstairs, I’m sure it’s something to do with kids actually doing some study. Maybe a building open all night wasn’t the right choice. But I was alone on the top floor so, can’t complain hey. 

 

11:45 pm — This was when things got interesting, I could hear someone roaming around but every time I looked it seemed to be emptier than the last. Almost like the aisles got darker, longer, emptier. This was about the time I wanted to throw in the towel, but I’m persistent. Or stubborn. Both are false and true.

 

7:00 am — I crashed out, sorry I couldn’t report more. The honest truth is that I got one of the best sleeps of my life in there. Fuck me it was good, catch you in the stacks. Come say hey to me and Casper.

 

You’re all missing out (or I’m late to the party) with sleeping in the aisles through the Library. Not shit, I’ll be returning when I’m feeling like some REM sleep or just some comfy ambience. Apart from the footsteps. I’ll let them go. 

 

S Block

 

1:00 am — I went for a wander (bring shoes to stop doors from closing and plan accordingly) and found lots of art but was met with a hella scary sight of just nothing. Ya know when you get to the top of the stairs and look towards the door facing R block? Well, have you seen it at night? How about going down the stairwell by the elevator? Oh, you don’t? Well get the FUCK out of my dms before you start accusing me of not having guts.

 

5:00 am — No part of me would like to let you know about the sound I made when I saw a student coming in to start their day. I’d spent about 3 hours hiding in the bathroom when I saw my reflection in the hall window–thinking it was going to be la llorona. I need to stop watching James Wan horror. Shout out to the young wāhine for not calling security when I screamed in her face. Cheers.

 

If you want to recreate the stair scene from Parasite, I have the location for you, and the lighting wouldn’t take much to recreate with that shoddy wiring. 

 

Law

 

7:20 pm — My earliest start, but also so damn busy. Do you Law kiddies never rest? Because here I am waiting to start my night of slumber only to be met with students everywhere.

 

12:00 am — No shit of a lie, kids only all left at this point. Maybe I’m just not well versed but are you having a “who’s the saddest sack with no personal life” competition? If so, the student wearing a suit jacket and button up Hawai’ian shirt takes the win, sorry mate but come on.

 

2:00 am — The concrete court of terror is actually so much nicer at night. Just fucking kidding, it’s colder and reminds me of what brutalist architects dream about. So my nightmare really. There were shadows and shit everywhere but nothing could take my attention from the absolute design monstrosity of that hole. It’s grey and god awful. 

 

6:53 am — Siri, how can I do a wellness check for a student? Left at midnight and back at the asscrack of dawn. The commitment? Palpable. Mental health? Completely wrecked. I worry about all of you. I may not have discovered ghosts but the spirits are present. Broken spirits of sad 3rd or 4th year kids unable to distinguish between life and work. My bros, take a night to sleep. Those readings aren’t shit.

 

Final verdict? Law kids are built differently. Case closed, sustained.

 

Teaching College

 

I’m not going to structure this by time, because there’s a major absence of time when you’re sitting under a table in the old cafeteria. There’s no light or sound except a subtle hum with a flicker from the once used advertising boards. Switching them on helped me have something. I needed something to help ground me in reality, everything was unreal and fading. My light was diming, internal self-worth diminishing to nothing. Enough on my failing on Tinder, this shit is so fucking haunted team.

 

I genuinely did see something staring at me from the door-way. Was it the souls of failing teaching students? Was it that awful painting coming to life? Or was it all the worst versions of myself manifesting themselves in a visual form? All answers are yes because TC is a bottomless pit, a succubus whose only goal is to ruin my life and the lives of those around me. 

 

At all points in the evening, I felt the presence of something and someone around me. I’m not exaggerating, that place is alive and the spirits are angry. I pray for the souls of everyone that’s ever had to spend time in there, shit’s off and I don’t think I’ll ever recover. But the snacks in the fridge were alright, solid comeback. 

 

Final Thoughts

 

If I was giving final rankings and thoughts, they would go as follow:

 

K Basement was av as, bad start as I got kicked out. +5 shit-cunt security.

 

The Basement was the most empty feeling–there was nothing going on but I kept getting a fright from nothing. +3 scary

 

L Block slept in a theatre. The only ghosts you could feel were kids sleeping through an English paper. +5 Shakespeare in love

 

The Library wasn’t the first time but was the first time I felt actual life in there. Wish it had turned out like ghostbusters. +666 gooey ghost cumshots

 

S Block had the most interesting experience. Said no one ever. +7 uses for the building other than thoroughfare.

 

Law can you all be so fucking forreal and just head home for a moe. +8.9 for utilising your after hours access.

 

Teaching College the scariest hole you could get stuck in. Well except for Judith Collins. +10 talofas

 

You can’t lie and tell me that there’s no ghosts roaming the empty halls in the early hours of the AM or under the guise of midnight blues. But if you want to lie or argue with me, you can flick me an email and I’ll happily tell you that you’re wrong and I don’t have to listen to you. Why do I have this right? Well because I’m a hard-hitting journalist with no intent on changing my opinion. Email is informant@nexusmag.co.nz, light it up mate.

 

Catch me next time when I explore ‘Where to leave your shit so it doesn’t get stolen so you can run and grab a bite to eat within classes’.