Using toys.

 

I firmly believe that people don’t grow out of toys; they get into new ones. I can’t name anyone who does not love a good sex toy. Why is this? Because they are crafted for one thing: pleasure. 

 

If you don’t like them, chances are you just haven’t found the right tool. The best part is you don’t even have to go into a sex store in your small town where you’ll know the cashier anymore; you can order them online. I was going to say try it out first, but for hygienic and moral issues, I don’t suggest that! 

I went into my local sex shop recently, and I could not believe the amount of weird shit they have. I’m not kink-shaming, nor am I judging; I’m just saying if you think there’s not a niche for whatever you’re into, I believe there is. 

 

Like all toys, some are better than others. You’re either a Lego or a Meccano kid, and I’m a Satisfyer Pro woman. Like you’re either someone good at sharing or not, but these are the toys that you’ve purchased for yourself, so it’s entirely up to you. This analogy also explains why I justify eating dessert for dinner at least twice a week, but the point is there are pros to being an adult. 

 

So, this is your sign! If you haven’t tried toys yet, go for it, and if you have, keep going! Order them online and keep them at the bottom of your bedside table! Don’t blame me if after this you don’t need your partner anymore…

 

Don’t use toys

 

I don’t care about mutual pleasure. It’s basically cheating. You only need me baby.