Crush Of The Week

Brakence

This man is a Bi-Icon and Hyper-Pop Emo-Rap legend. Go check him out on Spotify. (I would gatekeep him, but he’s just SO GOOD!!) I highly recommend rosier/punk2 (if you want to hear a man genuinely apologise in the most heart-wrenching love ballad ever written), venus fly trap (if you need a new song for you bedroom-mirror-concert playlist), and ginger tea (if you want to scream about something).

Don’t Quote Me

Gwyneth Paltrow: “I’d rather smoke crack than eat cheese from a tin.”
Gino D’Acampo “If my grandmother had wheels she would have been a bike.”
Madonna “Listen, everyone is entitled to my opinion.”
Ru Paul “Impersonating Beyoncé is not your destiny, child.”

Top 10

Characters I Think I Could Take In A Fight
  • Rodney Copperbottom (Robots): Just take out the screws… Or get a REALLY big magnet.
  • Wally (Where’s Wally?): Once I find that creepy little twit it’s OVER.
  • Ted (HIMYM): All you have to do is… not be Robin and he’ll be a mess.
  • Onceler (The Lorax): He’s just a sentient noodle dressed up as a leprechaun.
  • Prince Charming (Shrek): He already has a very punchable face.
  • Stripe (Gremlins): It’s just an evil Furby, innit?
  • Thing (The Addams Family): Rock Paper Scissors battle, or Chopsticks.
  • Steve (Minecraft): I have thumbs, and that’s my only advantage.
  • Alexander Hamilton (Hamilton): Give him a mild threat and he’ll destroy himself. Easy W. 
  • Michael Myers (Halloween): I would just walk a bit faster and not fall down. It’s not that hard.