Can we all collectively agree that the red sports house in school was the fucking best? I recently saw a TikTok talking about school sports, and so many people were gassing up the red house. Why? Because we were fucking on something. 

When I was in primary school in Australia, I was in the red house. Our name? Zeus. The only house that ever competed with us was the green house, named Apollo. If I’m being completely honest though, the only thing they had the upperhand in was swimming carnivals. Athletics Day? We had that shit in the mf bag. We were so good, that in my year, the races were basically a competition between myself and my classmate, Jess. When she came first, I came second, and vice versa. And guess what? We both wore red.

Once I moved to the UAE and started high school, sports houses were just not the same. Sports days were even worse. I was a sports captain and prefect in my last year, and I can’t even remember what house I was in charge of! But guess what? The red house still cleared (I might actually be lying because I don’t remember, but that’s besides the point). 

Basically, what I’m trying to tell you is that if you were in the red house during school, you are the best person in the entire world (yes, I am biassed). It’s not even a Gryffindor thing either- I’m apparently a Ravenclaw, so being in the red house wasn’t anything special wizarding-world-wise. It’s honestly just a we-are-the-best thing, and I will die on this hill. 

Anyways, all of this got me thinking: universities should have coloured houses. You know how in the states you get frat houses and sororities? We should have houses. You do the same little get-to-know-me survey for your halls in first year, and they place you in a house. Bonus points if there’s a sorting ceremony and a freaky hat. The houses have their own halls, common rooms, and merch, but they share a dining hall. The most important thing? They compete. In what? Duels and stuff. 

Let’s turn uni into Hogwarts, but make it cooler (maybe this is a wizarding world thing). 

Honestly, I just hope the reign of the red continues forever. I have no idea if it has ended, but I hope that the memories live on even if our empire crumbles. 

[I have paused The Nanny after pausing Naruto after pausing Game of Thrones in favour of bingeing the first few episodes of XO Kitty. I was watching To All The Boys I’ve Loved Before on the weekend when I realised that I hadn’t watched its sequel tv series. It’s a little annoying, and the second-hand embarrassment is strong, but I’m actually having a bit of a laugh. Q is the best, and Min Ho is SO hot.]

[BTW, before starting and then pausing GoT, I had paused Band of Brothers after pausing Battlestar Galactica.]