The theme for this week is “money,” and so originally this article was going to be on the different support paths you can take as you study, or something along those lines. But after the events of this week? I am angry, and heartbroken. So you know what? Get ready for a tough conversation. Because the willful ignorance and ableism of the community – everyone from doctors to our peers – is putting our disabled community in poverty. And trigger warning, it discusses hospitalisation.

 

First of all, let’s address the idea that disabled people can just “go to the doctor and get a referral.” This is often said by those who have the luxury of only needing to see their GP every so often, most often for antibiotics. Disabled people are often scrutinised at doctors appointments. We often have to prepare for these appointments and gather all of our evidence and then BEG for doctors to refer us. Even if our referrals get accepted – yes, they can be declined, even in the public system – then we have to beg doctors and prove why we are worth their time. And that, to be quite frank, is disgusting. And it often comes from the idea that young people “can’t be disabled,” and so are either “anxious” or “dramatic.” And that’s IF we can get a close appointment. Often we have to wait for months, even if it is for something urgent like running out of life changing medications or needing to see a crisis team. Emergency appointments? We are often told our disabilities can’t lead to emergencies and so we need to wait. Which can lead to irreparable damage. So please, don’t talk to us about emergency appointments.

 

Now, let’s address the medication issue. We tend to have to beg for medication – whether it’s for mental health or for pain – and repeat prescriptions for pain medication? Not going to happen. I got told “you can just get a repeat prescription” for my CRPS – a syndrome that puts me in so much pain I get taken to resus to make sure we can get my pain under control before my heart rate clocks higher than 180bpm, as many of my friends have witnessed – this week by multiple people. You really think getting a repeat prescription for oxycodone is a thing? Or diazepam? Do you know how insane we would look? If I asked my doctor for that, I’d be laughed out of the office. So no, me and other disabled people who have chronic pain and similar conditions have to go to the doctors regularly to prove we need the medication. Which we will do, because we understand the risks and we understand that these are controlled substances. But trying to diminish our experiences by saying we just need “a repeat prescription” and therefore “our medication isn’t necessarily an emergency?” Please, fucking check yourself. Try walking a mile in our shoes for a week, I don’t think you’d say that to ANY OF US. 

 

The last big one I got a lot this week? I pretend to be disabled “for the money.” ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME? Studylink alone has a TWENTY SIX PAGE FORM – not including the evidence you need to provide such as medical certificates, doctors support, prescriptions and bank statements, etc – that you have to fill before you usually receive no more than $30-$40 a week. That wouldn’t cover travel to our appointments, let alone our medications. Memberships to St. Johns. And because of our disabilities, we are less likely to be employed and more likely to struggle with money and affording literally anything. You think I – or anyone else – would choose this life? To choose to have our bodies analysed and to have to prove our health is falling apart in order to get assistance? It’s humiliating. You have no idea. As a result, we often have to choose between seeing a doctor, and eating. Paying for medication, or paying rent. This is our lives. And because you don’t always see our worst, you accuse us of faking it. Organisations like WINZ and Studylink – as well as our doctors and specialists – make that God damned impossible.

 

Most of the ableism I – and my friends – deal with is from other students at the university. And I myself have spent most of this week in tears trying to explain the reality of our experiences to others, just to be invalidated and ignored just because their experiences weren’t the same. Please know that your experiences are ones we pray for. We wish we had them. Don’t add to our trauma by acting like this doesn’t matter. We struggle to get financial support, to afford our medications, to see doctors. We struggle to afford to live. You want to help? Educate yourself. Fucking think for a sec. Because making our lives easier only happens when people listen to us and try to enact change. Your ableism and your willful ignorance to our reality is leaving us in poverty. And it leaves us heartbroken and angry. And we deserve better, because we are human too.