For the last six months, I’ve been waiting for the release of Barbie. I don’t think I have ever been so excited about anything. July 20th is going to be the best night of my life. 

 

Even if your wedding is on that day, I say cancel it; nothing comes before this.

 

I hope the feeling is mutual and you also feel this way. Otherwise, I sound like a lunatic. Note that this is all coming from someone who was not even allowed to have Barbies as a kid (I appreciate the effort, Mum, but beauty standards still got to me, lol). Don’t say you haven’t seen or heard anything about Barbie either- I’ve never seen a marketing campaign and budget like it. It’s the kind of fun Guerilla level marketing that convinced me to study a degree in the area, but we hardly see any of it in real life anymore. Name something more iconic than branding the pool floor of Sydney Icebergs. You can’t. 

 

Seriously though, who is funding this dream of a movie? I’ve never seen such a tastefully star-studded cast. I also can’t believe how well the PR team has pulled off having a stereotypical-looking ‘Barbie’ lead in 2023. I’m not complaining – I can’t name someone more perfect than Margot for the role. And the soundtrack? Already iconic! Ice Spice, Nicki Minaj, Dua Lipa, Billie Elish, and more. Female dominated, too; I love that for Barbs! The number of brands also releasing Barbie Mercy is out of this world. Don’t worry, I haven’t caved in yet and bought the Barbie X Impala Roller Skates. 

 

I’m writing a before-Barbie review because, with the hype it has built up (becoming my central fixation in life), I have to see if it lives up to it. From the shorts, it’s looking great; however, you know I will be in their front row on July 20th ready to chew your ear off about the movie as soon as it’s over. FYI, I’m going alone in case my enthusiasm puts off any date. 

 

I’m almost hurt that I was not invited to the Barbie Premier. The FOMO was unreal; the guest list was nailed every night. Every outfit worn to all eight premieres has been out of this world. They have even employed some of the most tasteful stylists I have seen. The only negative remarks I’ve seen about this movie, which trended on Twitter this week and I’m sure you saw too, is the group of absolute virgin white males that decided to say that Margot Robbie was too ‘mid’ for the role. I think this boiled everyone with more than half a brain’s blood because how could anyone call someone who complies with every beauty standard ever written by a man mid? If Margot Robbie is getting heat for not being Barbie enough to be Barbie, imagine how it was for Halle Bailey playing the little mermaid. I mean, we all saw the hate she got but fuck, but in both instances, the never-ending criticism just makes you realise how some people just suck, lol, and people will find a reason to hate no matter what, don’t take it personally. Even if you look like Barbie more than anyone else, it’s still insufficient for some fragile egos. 

 

It’s been perfect for me so far, so it’s getting a 10. See you in a few weeks to let you know if that changes once I have seen the movie!