Mullet Of The Week

N: Can you please just sort of introduce yourself?

J: I’m Jaybird, I’m from Alaska and I’ve been rocking a mullet for probably like twelve years.

N: Wow. I’m sure there has been a few highlights from your twelve years but can you just take us through your mullet journey?

J: Oh my god, my mullets have all the different colours, I’ve had steps, I’ve had bowl cuts, I’ve had no side burns, I’ve had sideburns, I’ve put it in braids and made it all crimpy like the 80’s in the back.

N: Do you have any mullet stereotypes you’d like to debunk?

J: That only rednecks have [mullets], and a fashion mullet has to be fashionable when really it can just be trashy and look good. 

N: So, does your mullet have a name?

J: Dirk the Mullet. 

N: And can you describe for us, your relationship with your mullet?

J: Uh I take good care of her, sometimes I cut her off. She’s very healthy for being dyed so frequently and also, I hope one day to have a curly mullet. 

N: What kind of mode of transportation do you have?

J: I have a little car. And a bike. And a skateboard.

N: What kind of car, bike and skateboard?

J: I don’t know about the skateboard, just an old piece of shit but I’ve had it for a while. I have a (Viaki?) Road Bike and I drive a plastic saturn. 

N: And how would you describe your mullet?

J: Very much a personality, grows really long in the front. I have to cut my bangs all the time, it grows so fast. And one side is always thicker than the other, its my left side. My left side is always thicker than the right no matter how long you let it grow. \

N: Your mullet in three words? Go. 

J: Space, wind, eternity.