Activities for the duration of your isolation

TOP 10

10. Read books – Attempt to appear smart by reading while you simultaneously piss your degree away

9. Train your dog – Having a mutt is good. Having a mutt that can sit is better

8. Put off your uni work – Just treat it like a holiday and live with the consequences later, you can always claim a derived grade for world pandemic related stress later 😉

7. Start exercising – Lying to yourself about how healthy you’ll be will take your mind off your constant failures

6. Piss off fake health experts – Argue with tools on Facebook. Nothing passes the time like rarking someone up

5. Update your Spotify playlists – Go out there and break away from the same albums you’ve been listening to for 4 years

4. Fight with your family – One outs dad, winner gets the hand sanitiser

3. Keep writing for Nexus – An essential job, keeping me afloat while I leech off my parents for the entire time

2. Masturbate excessively – Self explanatory

1. Stay inside – Follow the rules so you don’t kill someone’s grandparents you prat

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