Donald Trump unveils mathematical skills
Just over a month after bragging about his flawless cognitive examinations – Donald Trump has announced his intention on running for a Fourth Term in 2028: This is batshit in and of itself, but we’d especially like to highlight the fact that the guy is only sitting his second term right now. 1+1=4? Math
Cost of Leisure Chrisis
Despite receiving a 50k pay rise during a cost-of-living crisis Prime Minister Christopher Luxon has announced the working class, including those without a home will now be required to pay “yacht tax”
Winston Peters’s Indefatigable War On Woke
Taking a short break from tirelessly crusading against the rights of random Transgender kiwis, Winny announced the name of the two Te Moana-o-Raukawa ferries as Kupe and Cook, the latter name, he says, sniveling woke critics will “work themselves into a lather” over. The minister also teased some potential names for other projects: Like Boys Rule Girls Drool rail line & State Highway Hitler. Take that, wokies.
