A guy did me wrong? Go sleep with one of his friends. At least, that’s what I was recommended in the midst of past guy troubles. A perfect form of revenge if you’re ‘normal’, but what if the world of sleeping around isn’t one you live in? 

With the progression of normalised sex and things like rosters and casual relationships, it’s hard to be the person who sticks out from all that. The peer pressure to have more of a sex life wasn’t something I was prepared for, and the need to have control and protection over my body morphed more into the question of why don’t I just give it up already? Everyone else does it. 

Peer pressure is real, and honestly, I’d prefer to live in the time of romance where ankles were the most scandalous thing to flash someone. Just saying.  

One thing I’ve learned is that it is not always a group of individuals that create peer pressure, but the internalised cultures surrounding us. New Zealand seems to have a social culture with an emphasis on binge drinking. There are unspoken expectations that parties become about consuming large amounts of alcohol and it’s all a part of your cool young adult life. I don’t want to sound “holier-than-thou”; I am not adverse to shots with friends at The Don or cracking open a few cold ones at a mate’s birthday, but we must acknowledge the external factors and social norms that subconsciously influence us. The impact can be different for us all, and it’s great if drinking is something other than internalised peer pressure. But if you do feel pressured to drink beyond your limit regardless of whether you know it could have a negative impact, remember that everyone is different, and as long as you’re feeling ok and having fun that’s what matters.