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    Blair is Ace - Issue 8
    Blair “No-Nipples” Monrovia

    Now, people have been commenting recently that my column doesn’t seem to have much of a direction. When this is the critique of my friends, it’s fine, because they know I’m not going to hit them. Generally, they stick to remarks like “Oh, it’s funny, and I like it how you can manage to write about nothing, and still make it entertaining.”

    Smarty Pants
    CC

    I’m sitting on a bench by the lake with little more than a cursory attempt at food and wondering what it was that made me willing to pay what I did for it. It’s not often I succumb to this temptation because I KNOW there’s a way of getting the same coffee and brownie combination 10 TIMES for the same amount of cash. But the hour gap between classes isn’t time enough to whip out a batch of brownies.

    Christafari
    Big C and The Other One

    Lettuce is an interesting section of Nexus. Sometimes there are some interesting discussions and responses to issues raised by articles and columns. Sometimes even the Puzzle Page starts some interesting discussions. But, as I am sure most of you know, Lettuce is mostly filled with mindless hatred and insults, liberally covered with spelling and grammatical mistakes.

    Tales from Tinseltown - Issue 8
    Emma Edwards

    The Hollywood stars may have money, but they do not have perfect health. Whilst numerous stars preach to those less worthy of their fantastic appearance, not all is consistent. This was the case for Bret Michaels and Whitney Houston.

    Low five - Issue five

    Low Five
    1. If a meteorite was about to strike, ending the human race, what do you think we should do about it?
    2. What do you think of the Taiwanese Wheel Cake stand?
    3. Which kiwi would you like to see on the next dancing with the stars?
    4. If you could only watch one movie for the rest of your life, what would it be?
    5. What hot-air balloon shape would you like to see at next year’s Balloons over Waikato?

    Melanie
    Management
    1. Have a party.
    2. I try to avoid it!
    3. That little Chuck thing off the Chuppa Chups ads.

    The Forgotten People
    Bruce Clark

    A new bi-weekly column by Amnesty International

    Execution
    Jordan “Diamond Dallas” Bakerwitz

    I have done it. I have successfully infiltrated the WSU weekly board meetings. But it has not been easy. It has taken every ounce of my cunning, my determination, my skills learned from watching National Treasure and reading Dan Brown. Last week my source inside the WSU obtained secret documents and passed them on to me. They were seemingly innocuous, nothing more than the minutes to the previous meeting. But upon closer inspection it became apparent that these were coded messages. They were written in English, but I still had no idea what the heck they said.

    Tips 101: Lecture 4: Low budget fun in Hamilton
    Hollie Jackson

    Anyone who has ever lived, visited, or driven through Hamilton know that there really isn’t anything to do here. Hence why many only come here for the University or boyfriend/girlfriend/family then fuck off again. Over the 20-odd years of living here, I have discovered that this theory is true; there really is bugger all to do in Hamilton. However, the three main – only – things you can do for fun with no money are as follows:

    Blair is Ace
    Blair “Touch Me Please” Monrovia

    I am never drinking again. Yes, I am all too aware of how redundant this statement may seem, given the overwhelming evidence regarding youth drinking culture supplied to you in the most recent Nexus. Ed may be pleased to know that I’m actually making an effort to be topical this year, and to that end, I’m even trying to refer back to the one “publication” that has yet to cast me out in the cold.
    Oh wait.

    Fashion Police
    Kartal Cartel

    Crusty punks, you make think they are worthless pieces of shit, or think their Fucken awesome and want to be them, the day you don’t give a shit about anything! You have crusty friends or crusty inclinations and we like a lot of crusty music. But those are the exceptions. Whatever your views are on the Crusty punks we sure do love what they wear! And that leads us to an idea for a potential purpose for crusties. What if we could hunt them and skin them like exotic fur-bearing mammals? What if that were legal?