Making a last-minute accommodation booking on booking.com is stressful; you’re scrolling through details while the site yells “three other people are looking at this deal! Only two rooms left at this price!” But making an impulse reservation for a suspiciously low-priced room at the Four Canoes in Rotorua, was a decision I’d live to regret.
The only good thing about this hotel is that when the receptionist answers the phone, “Four Canoes!”, it sounds like he’s swearing in a bad Scottish accent (try it). The room pics were clearly taken with a very good Insta-filter, but the reality was disappointing.
The ceiling was low and had textured plaster swirls; a legacy of the ‘80s. Possibly asbestos. If I die, please feed my cat. The bathroom had years of embedded grime in the sink and shower, and there were numerous plaster-filled holes in the walls, remnants of the previous decade’s décor. The toilet was wedged in between the vanity and the shower, such that anyone with wider hips than Barbie could well get stuck, and the toilet roll holder was placed so far back that I felt like I was in a yoga torture chamber every time I reached for the roll.
The walls were thin, so I had the joy of listening to the neighbour snore all night, and the rooms were stuffy and un-air-conditioned.
My advice? Pay the extra $30 for the Copthorne, and always read the site reviews.