By Lyam Buchanan
Mar 09, 2018

Top 10: Reasons You Shouldn't Call Noise Control on Your Neighbours

It’s natural for your patience to run thin. Sometimes you’re just not in the mood to listen to the enjoyment of others. Maybe you’ve got a big day tomorrow, or you just wanted an early night. Either way, it’s better to just hold your tongue; who are you to stand in the way of someone else having a good night?

  1. Jealousy is a cruel beast. It’s time to swallow your pride. You may not have been invited, but it’s probably for good reason.
  2. Just because you’re not enjoying your night, doesn’t mean others can’t. Just relax, reminisce of the times when you used to smile, when you looked forward to each and every day. 
  3. Do you really want to be that person? Imagine how they’ll feel receiving an angry knock on the door in the midst of their favourite tune. That’d be your fault. 
  4. Why call noise control when you could anonymously heckle them from your window? They may not hear you, but your other neighbours will realise you’re truly not someone to be messed with.
  5. Wouldn’t you be better off just challenging them to a charity boxing night? Not only do you get to raise funds for those in need, but you’ll recieve a much need jaw realignment.
  6. Don’t worry, someone else is bound to call. Just like someone was bound to call the police in Kew Gardens, New York City, March 13th 1964.
  7. Think of all the times you’ve brought aural pain to neighbouring residents. Be patient, show them the same courtesy.
  8. Pop over and join in. Yeah your ex might be there, and things are still kinda weird, but what’s the worst that could happen?
  9. They might just be second year law students from Auckland or Otago partaking in various activities forced upon them through peer pressure. It’s just harmless fun though right???
  10. Fuck it, call them.

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